So, what do you do for a living?

I once wrote a paper on Rousseau’s idea outlined in The Social Contract; that we are in constant competition with each other, ultimately falling into an interdependent cycle. To illustrate a point, I wrote about a personal pet peeve, one that I still see almost daily.

Meet someone new? They’ll ask your name… Then, they’ll ask what you do for a living.

That’s annoying. Do you really need to know that I’m a writer before you, what? Decide if you’re going to keep talking to me? Ask to borrow money? As soon as you hear what someone does for a living, you put them in a box. That person is creative. That person is dull. That person is strong. That person is smart. That person is boring. You may not even realize that you do this. But you do.

Over the last couple of years I’ve wondered why, when I explained to someone that I’m a freelance writer/business owner, some people then ask “what else do you do?” Or “so you do that all the time?” I finally realized that there are a lot of people out there that when queried, explain that they are a writer/artist/model/etc., instead of stating where it is that they actually work and derive their income. This is a curious phenomenon.

Surely, when someone asks “what do you do?” they don’t mean “what is your hobby?” or “what are your interests?” I haven’t been out of school long enough for the question’s meaning to have changed that drastically. So what happened?

  • More and more people are dissatisfied with their career path. Let’s face facts- life passes like a blink, and many people never thought they’d be doing what they do. For. The. Rest. Of. My. Life. Not only do many people feel like they don’t have time to pursue what they’d really like to be doing, that dream seems farther and farther away each year. In fact, you probably won’t be doing the same thing forever. Most people change careers a half dozen times in their lifetime. But in the meantime, is it right to lay claim to a diversion as a profession?
  • People don’t take pride in their work like they used to. My parents were raised in the shadow of the depression and the Irish Catholic work ethic flag always waved at our house. By God, even if you didn’t like your job, you darn sure showed up on time and you darn sure worked hard. When I worked at a series of part-time jobs in college, it never occurred to me to lie about what I did for a living or to try to avoid that inevitable question about the nature of my work. It was what I did, working as a video jockey/frozen yogurt queen/motorcycle parts store clerk. That was my job. I knew I wouldn’t do it forever, but I took the jobs seriously and I worked hard.
  • Work has taken over our lives. No longer something you do five days a week, companies want your blood, sweat and tears to keep the cogs moving and the dollars rolling in. Most people spend more time with the people they work with than with their loved ones. And that’s gonna shape you, no matter how you slice it. It’s going to influence the influence-able into thinking that they have to behave a certain way from 8-5. And inevitably, those attitudes spill over into your leisure time, too, affecting your decision-making process and your lifestyle.


Jobs in the service industry are on a huge upswing, and manufacturing jobs are down. We’re moving to a world where we don’t produce anything, but we can serve your drinks and style your hair- and we definitely want to look good while we’re sitting in a nightclub. Dissatisfaction breeds contempt, and it’s this pressure that threatens our survival.

As Rousseau said, we are in constant competition with each other. Yet we rely upon each other… even if we don’t like it very much. In a country where a recession continues to loom, gas prices “might” stabilize this month at $2.10 and houses continue to sit on the market after a year or more, you would think we’d have something else to talk about. Especially since so many people prefer not to be defined by what they do for a living. But no. Knowing how we measure up to the guy sitting next to us or the woman on the elevator reigns supreme.

The next time you meet someone, try to see how long it takes before you ask them- or they ask you- this question. I find it’s almost always the second of third question asked, and inevitably asked within the first five minutes of the meeting. You might even try an experiment, to see how many other bases you can cover before you run out of conversation.

So, what do you do?


Things To Do Today in Northern Kentucky:

#1 Eat at a locally-owned restaurant.
#2 Go see a band who plays original music.
#3 Support Northern Kentucky bars and go have a drink.

Comments

Lisa said…
ya, I know what you're saying, kel, and it probably is a compliment... I just feel like I keep hearing this same dang question over and over and I always have to justify what I do for a living... I had to do it again tonight. It's like a big question mark for some people. Who cares, really?
Hey, Lisa! I've been meaning to comment on this for a couple of weeks.

I think that, when people hear that someone is a writer, it sounds like such a "dream" job, similar to if someone said -- "Oh, I'm an actor." We might automatically assume that this person waits tables during the day and frantically auditions at night. In reality, though . . . this person may be . . . An Actor.

So, the reaction to "I"m a writer" is, in some ways a compliment, as we're doing something that others want to do but aren't sure of the steps to take to get there.

I know what you mean, by the way, about the Irish work ethic. NOT working is NOT an option. Can't find the job you want? Peel potatoes until you do. And, in college, I did!

Love your blog. Keep it up!

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